Dude where am i.

in the words of Randy Quaid in Independant Days screw you alien asshole fight. i can now say IMMMMM BAAAAAACK!

being caught in the western NC flooding is no joke. the rain started wednesday afternoon (a prelude of what was to come). i was in asheville at a dentist appointment. the rain started at end of appointment and after 15min into the drive back home i have never seen crashing waves on a fricken freeway. Dude, i could have taken the car through the wave pipes and surfed on home. Then came thursday kinda quiet nothing overwhelming, just laying back drinkin the shine so to speak. THEN all hell broke loose on friday, no power, no internet, no cell phone, i did have a gas stove but had to manually light the pilot light. thank goodness for well/spring water being gravity fed to the house. The mrs and i and lance just kinda hunkered down. woke up saturday morning to mass destruction to our driveway that leads to a washedout culvert to get on the paved road (with portions of that collapsed). didnt know what was going on in the outside world as we had nothing to use to find out. i was able to dig out an old radio and found a station that was covering the destruction of "biblical proportions" on sunday. that is when i realized UH-OH we are screwed. monday we had a 13 yr old boy walk up the ridge to our homes and asked for help to find his dad and a baby. the boy had a back pack with diapers and wipes strapped on and water/formula/milk hanging out of pouches. he was very quite and quite scared. Lance, jumped on his 4-wheeler and said "Let's go find your dad". i was able to get over the washed out culvert to go to work a 12min drive prior to flooding but this day took 1 1/2 hours. washed out roads/bridges, small communities GONE very surreal and humbling to see such destruction. power was restored this day and i was quite thankful that i now had power/gas stove/water. refrigeration/freezer items starting to go so i cooked everything we had up. side note did you know you could cook frozen biscuits on the grill!!! this was a win as i had 4 packs of sausage from winter slaughter left in the freezer. i had sausage and biscuits coming out every orifice of my body. also no more very cold spring water to take a shower, that will really shrivel up an old man's tallywacker! I was able to get to text nic a couple of times from work to have him manage mine and lance's teams as we did not know when we would have cable/internet again. now the coup de gras wednesday we got cable/internet back but prior to that i bought a hd antenna to see if we could get the tv working. as most of you know i fall over quite a bit, well it happened i fell and put my hand out to keep from falling to the ground and poof tv screen broke. damn damn damn all because i was trying to hook up an antenna. The TV access gods were not on my side as i moved another tv into the living room i tripped on the rug in the living room ANOTHER tv destroyed. i resigned myself to my chair vowing not to try and walk anymore that day!!!! Entire communities are wiped from the face of this earth, 200+ dead and no we did not find the Dad and Baby mentioned earlier. OH least i forgot to mention on that search/rescue lance was shot at for going onto someones land. he basically, just said "screw you, rot in hell while not accepting help when help is available". so many pets are dead and lying around he said. but hey i do have Fantasy Football now and this will occupy my time and forget about the outside world. and finally, i was able to get 2-10man, 2-12man, 3-10man, and 3-12man standing sheets completed. we are good to go for next year!! woohoo.